Last night.

Last night my friend talked me in to going see a movie. I didn't really want to go without Trey but we didn't have time to wait for im so i went. I had a lot of fun, but i couldn't stop thinking about him. I missed him and longed to be in his arms. Well when i got home he was laying down. I went tell him that i was there and went get on the computer for a few. well when i talked to him he told me to find another place to sleep. I dont understand why he said that. I know we've been fighting alot but im not giving up so why is he? Im starting to get this feeling that he doesn't love me. well not really that as much as hes not in love with me. Its cuts like razors just thinking about it. I love him. My place in the world is next to him. So why is he pushing me away? I know i haven't been myself lately, but everyone goes through that. Its not exactly easy but we're supposed to work things out. He wont talk to me. I begged him to talk to me about this, I need him to tell me whats going on, so that we can make things work. He doesn't understand that we both have to try. I know im not perfect and im not saying i've been doing everything right cuz i know i haven't. But i want this enough to change, at least to try. I wish he did. I only know one thing and that is I cant run anymore. This is usually the point where i run away, but things are different, you dont run from the ones you love, you stand by their side and support what ever descision they make, no matter how much it hurts. I dont want to be seperated. I dont want to sleep with out him every night. I want to be able to tell him i love him, but if he tells me again that thats what he wants im going to respect that. I cant keep acting like we're in 8th grade anymore. We're both different people. I have to accept that. Things arn't going to be like they were years ago. We've both gone through too much. I just want him to know, no matter what he descides, that i do love him. That he means everything to me. But im not giving up!!!!!